It's only weather!

Here's a shock, if you have a weather channel that pumps out information on the weather 24/7/365 and the forecast for 99% of the time is "Warm and Sunny" then don't be surprised if they talk themselves into a frenzy when something actually happens. We are currently experiencing the outer reaches of Hurricane Irene, It's a pretty big storm, about 600 miles across and 115 mile an hour winds in the centre so you can imagine what the weather guru's are doing right? Running around in circles yelping like puppies.

The gist of the advice is, 1. Leave the area and don't come back until the FEMA trailers are in place or 2. Stay put, tie yourself to the bed and drink lots of water?? So where are our intrepid studio pundits? Standing on a *&^%ing beach with an iPad each, an iPad? What are they playing at, Farmville? It's BEHIND you, you don't need a friggin computer and a 1st class ticket to ground zero, try opening the curtains and looking out the window, better still use one of those satellites you have looking down, They're amazing, I can see my ducks on my pond with Google Earth (seriously, I can) I'm pretty sure you can see a 600 mile storm. What am I saying of course you can, EVERYTIME you turn on the TV.

This brings me to my next point, PANIC, having started warning us about the end of the world 10 days ago and worked the entire east coast into a water hoarding frenzy, having dispatched our finest iPad wielding Farmville land barons to the front line of the apocalypse, you expect us to turn over and watch the next episode of X Factor or whatever. No chance, we're glued to it, every raindrop has a name and my name is insomnia, I woke up at 1am two days ago when my wife turned on the TV to find out where Irene was, I shit you not, we didn't turn the TV off until 11pm and it was 400 miles from Bermuda then, it's called Irene not Concorde, Jesus. But this is what we're reduced to, it's pathetic.

Now the predictions, apparently New York is gonna be under 6 foot of water and civilization as we know it is going to break down, all on Saturday night, which should be fun to watch, they're going to evacuate 600,000 people, where to? I know, try South Carolina, there's no-one here and god knows we have enough bottled water.

Rant Over.